On Marriage and Family Life

Description

1. Homily 19 on 1 Corinthians 7
2. Homily 20 on Ephesians 5:22-33
3. Homily 21 on Ephesians 6:1-4
4. Homily 12 on Colossians 4:12-18

cf. his homily on 1 Corinthians 11:16

and his homily 78 on the parable of the ten virgins (Mt. 25:1-13), from matins for the Common of Virgins

über-patriarchal quote from commentary on 1 Corinthians 11:9 "For neither was the man created for the woman, but the woman for the man.":

superiorities of men over women, that:

1. Christ is the head of us, and we of the woman;
2. we are the glory of God, but the woman of us;
3. we are not of the woman, but she of us;
4. we are not for her, but she for us.

ref:15.47:

banish this notion from her soul, of mine and yours. If she say the word mine, say unto her, What things do you call yours? For in truth I know not; I for my part have nothing of my own. How then do you speak of 'mine,' when all things are yours? Freely grant her the word. Do you not perceive that such is our practice with children? When, while we are holding anything, a child snatches it, and wishes again to get hold of some other thing, we allow it, and say, Yes, and this is yours, and that is yours. The same also let us do with a wife; for her temper is more or less like a child's; and if she says mine, say, why, everything is yours, and I am yours. Nor is the expression one of flattery, but of exceeding wisdom. Thus will you be able to abate her wrath, and put an end to her disappointment. For it is flattery when a man does an unworthy act with an evil object: whereas this is the highest philosophy. Say then, Even I am yours, my child; this advice Paul gives me where he says, 'The husband has not power over his own body, but the wife.'4 6 If I have no power over my body, but you have, much more have you over my possessions. By saying these things you will have quieted her, you will have quenched the fire, you will have shamed the devil, you will have made her more your slave than one bought with money, with this language you will have bound her fast. Thus then, by your own language, teach her never to speak of mine and yours. And again, never call her simply by her name, but with terms of endearment, with honor, with much love. Honor her, and she will not need honor from others; she will not want the glory that comes from others, if she enjoys that which comes from you. Prefer her before all, on every account, both for her beauty and her discernment, and praise her. You will thus persuade her to give heed to none that are without, but to scorn all the world except yourself. Teach her the fear of God, and all good things will flow from this as from a fountain, and the house will be full of ten thousand blessings.

"Christian tradition often seems to give only grudging approval of married life, particularly its sexual aspect. In these sermons we find an important corrective to this view. Although himself a monk, Chrysostom had a profound understanding of the needs of his congregation. Inspired by the epistles to the Corinthians and Ephesians, he discusses the reasons God instituted marriage--primarily to promote holiness of the husband and wife, and only secondarily to produce children. Chrysostom goes on to discuss sexual relations, the mutual responsibilities of marriage, and parenting. While parts of vast majority of his advice has timeless relevance for the Christian family." -- Back cover